As we age, it is
inevitable, unfortunately, that our parents, other relatives and close friends
often pass on to the next phase of existence before us. This leaves us alone, bewildered and often in
a state of instability, in some ways, for quite some time. Some of us will outlive our spouses and even
our children. This can be extreme emotional
experiences to say the least. Some
individuals find it almost impossible to carry on and become trapped in the
past and the loss of their plans with those that have passed on.
Life is for the living
(with the occasional visit and regular guidance from the other side). Our loved ones would never want us to miss
the experience of living. That is a very
extreme price to pay.
They say that fear
leads to a life half lived. Living in
the past due to loss leads to a life not lived at all.
It is certainly a
natural process to grieve and each and every stage must be experienced. Visit the grief and experience it but this
does not mean that we have to move in for the rest of our lives. If we ignore or try to pass by one of the
steps of grieving, often times we meet up with this stage again later in our
lives. Experience the denial; point your
fingers to blame; experience the anger; experience the loss. If we do not go through the stages, we can
keep reliving the loss each time there is another loss in life completely
unrelated. The relapse can be just as
painful as the original experience itself.
We should not run from
our feels. Allow the process of grieving
to take place. Yes it can be
overwhelming but there is no real escape from reality and what has taken place.
Mourn the loss of your
loved ones but do not forget to also celebrate the life that you were so blessed
to share with them. “Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all”~Alfred
Lord Tennyson
They say that losing a
loved one is easier for those that believe in life after death. I suppose we are the fortunate ones for we
will receive glimpses of their eternal existence. Living within a focus on this belief
structure can certainly helps to sooth the pain although for most of us there is
no escaping the sadness and grief initially.
There are far too many
similar stories and experienced for me to ever doubt an existence after we pass
on. We will leave it to each of you to
find your own answers, but always stay open to all possibilities. If we close the door, nothing can be revealed. (Don’t let fear dictate!)
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