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Thursday 11 October 2018

THE NEXT PHASE



As we age, it is inevitable, unfortunately, that our parents, other relatives and close friends often pass on to the next phase of existence before us.  This leaves us alone, bewildered and often in a state of instability, in some ways, for quite some time.  Some of us will outlive our spouses and even our children.  This can be extreme emotional experiences to say the least.  Some individuals find it almost impossible to carry on and become trapped in the past and the loss of their plans with those that have passed on. 

Life is for the living (with the occasional visit and regular guidance from the other side).  Our loved ones would never want us to miss the experience of living.  That is a very extreme price to pay. 

They say that fear leads to a life half lived.  Living in the past due to loss leads to a life not lived at all.

It is certainly a natural process to grieve and each and every stage must be experienced.  Visit the grief and experience it but this does not mean that we have to move in for the rest of our lives.  If we ignore or try to pass by one of the steps of grieving, often times we meet up with this stage again later in our lives.  Experience the denial; point your fingers to blame; experience the anger; experience the loss.  If we do not go through the stages, we can keep reliving the loss each time there is another loss in life completely unrelated.  The relapse can be just as painful as the original experience itself. 

We should not run from our feels.  Allow the process of grieving to take place.  Yes it can be overwhelming but there is no real escape from reality and what has taken place.

Mourn the loss of your loved ones but do not forget to also celebrate the life that you were so blessed to share with them.  “Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all”~Alfred Lord Tennyson 

They say that losing a loved one is easier for those that believe in life after death.  I suppose we are the fortunate ones for we will receive glimpses of their eternal existence.  Living within a focus on this belief structure can certainly helps to sooth the pain although for most of us there is no escaping the sadness and grief initially.

There are far too many similar stories and experienced for me to ever doubt an existence after we pass on.  We will leave it to each of you to find your own answers, but always stay open to all possibilities.  If we close the door, nothing can be revealed.  (Don’t let fear dictate!)

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